Are You a People Pleaser? Tips on How to Overcome It
You are living with a misconception if you think that people-pleasing is just about helping others and being nice to them. Well, the truth is – it is more than just being kind to people. It involves putting others’ needs beyond your own. It is about going beyond your capability to please someone else.
You should think twice if you go too far to please others and if it leaves you feeling stressed, depressed and anxious. People-pleasing behavior often causes problems. Also, you can be in trouble when you try to please others, ignoring your own needs. So, for your own well-being, stop being a people pleaser. Also, take care of your needs first.
Are You a People Pleaser – Know the Truth
Here are some signs that you can consider yourself a people pleaser –
- You find it extremely difficult to say “no” to people
- You feel guilty when you have to say no to others
- You always think – what others are going to think about you
- You don’t think about your own needs while doing things for others
- You always seek approval and validation from others
Insecurity and low self-esteem are the two major factors that contribute significantly to people-pleasing behavior. If you are a people pleaser, now it’s high time to think about this matter. Stop neglecting your own needs in order to make someone else happy and take care of your mental health.
How to Stop Yourself from Being a People Pleaser – Best Tips for You
Here are some tips on how to say no to people-pleasing behavior:
1. Set and Maintain Healthy Boundaries
You should always know what your limits and needs are. Be clear about your limits and capability and then, set a healthy boundary. If someone asks you for too much, learn to say no to them and let them know about your boundaries and limits. It is always necessary to set and maintain healthy boundaries. You need to do it for your own well-being.
2. Be Assertive and Stop Making Excuses
When you feel that someone is asking too much from you, let them know that it’s beyond your capability. Be assertive and say no to them directly, rather than making excuses. When you learn to say no effectively, others will also respect your boundaries. So, being assertive is necessary sometimes.
3. Try to Be Authentic
You will be at peace when you learn to act authentically. Try to understand your values and needs instead of seeking others’ approval and validation. When you value yourself and stop thinking about what others are going to think if you say no to them, your mental health will be improved. Just relax and act authentically.
4. Think about Your Priorities
Set your priorities first and decide who you want to help. Setting your priorities will help you understand where you want to invest your time and energy. This will also help you know when to say no or when to stop. So, just think about your priorities before taking on a job or responsibility
It is not easy to accept the truth and also to change yourself. But it is not impossible, and you can start working on yourself anytime you want. You should have the courage to accept the truth that you are abusive. Also, it is necessary to have the determination and patience to change your abusive mindset. No matter how hard it is, you need to commit to changing yourself, and we know you can do it.
5. Let It Go
Don’t go too far to fulfill the request of toxic people, just because they were close to you once and you want to please them. Trust us; it is not good for your mental health. You will always remain imprisoned by them when you take on any job in order to make them happy. Rather, accept the truth that they are not close anymore and let them go. Stop pleasing them.
When you realize your value and stop worrying about what others are going to think about you, whether they will like you etc., you will be free. You will stop being a people pleaser, and you will be at peace. Remember, it’s never too late – start working on yourself today and get rid of anxiety and stress.